“I am not doing enough… No one notices anything that I do… I am lazy because I don’t work a traditional job and earn a salary… I am a disappointment…”

Have you ever spoke these words over yourselves? Have you ever felt like you’re letting people down? I know I sure have. In fact, I am feeling that way right now.

Right now, our incomes match our expenses… pretty scary place to be.

Do I just put my hopes and dreams of being a present stay at home mom aside and just go get a job and pay childcare? Do I throw myself to an online side business and hope it grows fast to make me a solid income?

As a Christian, I know I am called to not fear. I know I am called to pray and let my requests be made known to the Lord. Why does knowing these truths not take away the fear? Why are my requests feeling like I am trying to take the lazy and easy way out of life?

The answer is the enemy.

The enemy knows God’s truth but he tries to warp our thinking about the truth. He sells God’s truth short. He gets us to second guess our worth and value. He gets us to put our identity in what we do and how successful to other people we look. I am here to tell the enemy that he can SHOVE IT. In my life and in yours.

On this exact day… as I write this… as I feel this way… I am declaring these truths:

God has a plan for my life. Plans to give me hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11).

I do not have to strive anymore because His yolk is easy and His burden is light (Matthew 11:28-30).

Is my worth tied to how clean the house looks? Is my worth tied to how prepared the dinner time meal is? Is my worth tied to how much money my side gigs bring in? Is my worth tied to how kind and patient the kids are? I know we all know the answer to this, but how true does this feel? I can’t be alone in this! Oh, and that answer is no..

My worth, my hope, my identity, my everything can only be found in the life, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Without His love and grace, I am doomed to fail and lose in this life. The enemy wins when I am not on team Jesus. The enemy is not afraid of man but he is afraid of God. He knows God’s power. But GOOD NEWS. God’s power and presence now lives in us who have faith in Jesus. Because Jesus lived a sinless life and died the death we deserved, we now have everlasting life with Jesus through His sacrifice on the cross. This is the Gospel.

GOSPEL = GOOD NEWS!

So, no matter what I am going through, I can tell myself about the grace, love and hope we have in Jesus and it can wash away all of that fear, shame and guilt. In fact, it is doing just that RIGHT NOW. I started off writing this post feeling so discouraged and I am finishing writing this feeling totally encouraged because of the Gospel.

Praise the Lord. Gratitude and anxiety cannot co-exist.

Jesus, I am grateful for You and Your love. Please help me remember the Gospel throughout the day and turn my life into a life of praise and worship.

God is not like us. God looks to the heart and not to the works. So, whatever you do, do all for the glory of God.

1 Samuel 16:7 “For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”

“So, whether you ear or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”

Light and Free